i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
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