we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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