no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Randomize
