I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize
