And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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