So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
