Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
