check it out our google latitudes are spooning
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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