I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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