You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
