it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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