I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
