O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Dignity is for republicans.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
