i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
