you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
