she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
God, I missed his penis.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize