just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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