That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
