we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
