Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
