Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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