in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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