Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
