I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
