Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
