This is not my ceiling
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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