the new term for farting is butt boxing.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
