The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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