Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
