Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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