Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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