So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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