I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
