This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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