is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
