if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize