Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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