Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
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