would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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