i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
high people should be assigned attendants
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
He felt like a one man threesome
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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