lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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