Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
