i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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