We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
