If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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