All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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