I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
