Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
