I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
