no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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