i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
