this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Randomize
